Now I Understand

[dizzojay]

Okay, it took me a while, but here's a little cathartic drabble following the trauma of the season finale ...

NOW I UNDERSTAND

Rating: K+
Genre: Tragedy/Angst
Characters: Sam and Dean Winchester
Spoilers/Warnings: Huge spoilers for 9.23
Word Count: 100
Disclaimer: I don't own them

Tag to Dean’s death scene
Sam’s big enough to admit his mistakes; Sam’s POV

xxxxx

Cradling Dean's broken, lifeless body against mine, I remember those furious words I'd spoken so long ago; words that prompted this miserable silo mentality we've both descended into.

I'd told Dean that I wouldn't help him if he died. He'd looked hurt; I'd felt justified.

But now I get it; I understand, and I desperately wish I could unsay those words.

A lifetime without Dean stretches before me and I can't face it. I want to die right now, right alongside him.

Gathering him closer, I want to occupy the same space; physics be damned.

I'll get him back.

Whatever it takes.

xxxxx

end

Comments

[metallidean-grl.livejournal.com]

Absolute perfection. I think we all knew that what Sam said wasn't really true. It is just unfortunate that Sam has to realize the mistakes of his words with the actuality of Dean's death. It's never quite as comfortable when the shoe is on the other foot, is it.

[dizzojay.livejournal.com]

Sadly, it's always the ones we love that we hurt the most in the heat of the moment :(