The Little Show that never ends is ending - and not a single one of us is ready.

[dizzojay]

I'm not, for one moment suggesting that what the fandom is going through right now compares in any way to the indescribable pain and despair of a bereavement; that would be insulting to everyone who has ever lost a loved-one.  But it doesn't alter the fact that what we are all going through is a form of grieving process.  All over social media, I've seen people talking about feeling 'empty', 'numb', 'shocked', being in denial, in despair, being scared, lonely, even angry.

I've spent the last two days feeling low and weepy. Not full-on sobbing and howling, just going about my daily life with the emotion bubbling constantly under the surface and tears intermittently streaming down my face.  I think I need that explosion of emotion - of crying and ugly sobbing - to let it all out, but right now I think I'm just too numb for that to happen.

When I think of life post-Supernatural, I keep coming back to Philip Seymour Hoffman's melancholy words in the Boat that Rocked...

'I made a terrible mistake. I realized something, and instead of crushing the thought the moment it came I... I let it hang on, and now I know it to be true. And I'm afraid it's stuck in my head forever.  These are the best days of our lives.  It's a terrible thing to know.'

I sincerely hope that I'm proved wrong, but right now - I can't see it.

Comments

[stir-of-echoes.livejournal.com]

I am so trying to keep the tears at bay, I'm afraid if I give in to them I may not stop. I understand their decision and support them but damn it hurts. It really does. I'm going to miss the characters so much, and the feeling of family that the actors and crew fostered. We are a family, and I've seem such an outpouring of hurt from so many people. I've had some lovely supportive messages and hugs from all corners of the globe. We'll be here for each other, because yes, family don't end in blood.

[dizzojay.livejournal.com]

You're so right, there's so much we'll miss. The support of the fandom is going to become so vital over the coming months x

[stir-of-echoes.livejournal.com]

It is we need to be here for each other, we'll have none of the It's just a tv show Or he's not a real person Who cares if it is a TV show, I’ve bonded with this show and its characters. I know more about them than I do my neighbours. We’ve shared fourteen years together fourteen years of pain, heartache and loss but on the slip side an abundance of joy and hope.

It’s a show about family, it’s a fandom about family something the cast has fostered and, we continue to foster.

And we are a family and as family it’s time to rally around each other.