The Little Show that never ends is ending - and not a single one of us is ready.

[dizzojay]

I'm not, for one moment suggesting that what the fandom is going through right now compares in any way to the indescribable pain and despair of a bereavement; that would be insulting to everyone who has ever lost a loved-one.  But it doesn't alter the fact that what we are all going through is a form of grieving process.  All over social media, I've seen people talking about feeling 'empty', 'numb', 'shocked', being in denial, in despair, being scared, lonely, even angry.

I've spent the last two days feeling low and weepy. Not full-on sobbing and howling, just going about my daily life with the emotion bubbling constantly under the surface and tears intermittently streaming down my face.  I think I need that explosion of emotion - of crying and ugly sobbing - to let it all out, but right now I think I'm just too numb for that to happen.

When I think of life post-Supernatural, I keep coming back to Philip Seymour Hoffman's melancholy words in the Boat that Rocked...

'I made a terrible mistake. I realized something, and instead of crushing the thought the moment it came I... I let it hang on, and now I know it to be true. And I'm afraid it's stuck in my head forever.  These are the best days of our lives.  It's a terrible thing to know.'

I sincerely hope that I'm proved wrong, but right now - I can't see it.

Comments

[stolenglimpse.livejournal.com]

I don't know if it's because I haven't followed the show from beginning to end on a non-stop basis last most fans have... you know... not watching on TV after moving out of the parents place and not having the channel... catching some things online but nothing more and then buying the seasons as they come out but not really watching... and then binge watch from season 1 up to 10 and only 4 episodes of 11 and stopping again... but I'm not feeling as sad about the show ending as maybe I should?

I mean, I am, don't get me wrong... Sam and Dean and Cas forever, obviously and Supernatural is forever going to be a favorite show of mine but... I don't know. I admit feeling shocked when I saw on twitter the other day that the show would end after season 15 and my reaction was "noooo!!" but then I started thinking that, well, it did run its course. For a show that was originally intended to only go for 5 seasons, it did 10 more and that's amazing considering some shows don't make it through a full season 1.

I'm not sure what I wanted to say came out in this but I guess I might not be as sad about it as many fans are...

[dizzojay.livejournal.com]

I wish I could say I felt like you. I really feel bereft, and it's a feeling that's only going to intensify as we approach the end. I think I've cried more tears over the last week than this year and last year put together!!