Numbers

Apr. 30th, 2017 09:43 pm
dizzojay: (Default)

NUMBERS

Rating: K+
Genre: Family/Friendship
Character: Impala
Spoilers/Warnings: None
Word Count: 200
Disclaimer: I don't own her.

After her fiftieth birthday, the Impala reflects on the important numbers in her life.

xxxxx

Like any other car, my life is ruled by numbers.

I was built in 1967, so it's been fifty years. Fifty years on the open road since I first rolled off the forecourt. In that time I've had three owners and countless trips that have chalked up over two hundred thousand miles. I lost count after the clock ticked round the second time. It's my age, y'know?

I cost two thousand, two hundred bucks when John Winchester bought me; I have an eight valve engine, a three twenty seven, four barrel carburetor, a top speed of a hundred mph and I pull two seventy five horsepower.

I'm a big ol' bird, with a hundred and nineteen inch wheelbase, and no, I'm not telling you how much I weigh – a girl's gotta have some mystery, after all!

Over the years, I've had two hundred and twenty four tyres, one hundred and ninety two headlamps, seven timing belts, three gearboxes, and one complete rebuild.

But, all things considered, there's only one number I care about. That number has kept me on the road, and gives my life meaning. It's the number I love more than life itself.

That number is two.

And those two are walking toward me right now.

xxxxx

end



dizzojay: (Dean)






Today marks the half-century for one very special lady.
She's big, she's beautiful and she's Dean Winchester's number one girl bar none.

Happy birthday to our wonderful Lady Metallicar
A true screen goddess!

dizzojay: (Default)
BABY'S BIG DAY - originally written for the DEW challenge on Spn-Bigpretzel (challenge theme Impala/gravity) and the Fanfiction.net weekly challenge (challenge word - dense)


Genre: Humour
Rating: K+
Characters: Impala, Dean
Spoilers/warnings: None
Word Count: 100
Disclaimer: I don't own them!

Impala POV



It’s been two days, and Dean hasn’t figured out what’s wrong with me yet.

He’s been rummaging under my hood – not that I’m complaining mind – tightening whatever he can tighten, replacing and oiling things, and he still can’t understand why I’m not starting.

Dean honey, you’re not that dense. Just think about it; you obviously haven’t grasped the gravity of the situation.

You can tinker and fiddle as much as you like, don’t let me stop you. But it’s my birthday soon, and until I see you booking my platinum grade valet, complete with tyre polish and leather treatment, I’m not budging!!

xxxxx

end
dizzojay: (Dean)
It's a wrap on the [livejournal.com profile] spn_bigpretzel Hallowe'en Reverse Mini Bang for another year, and as always, everyone excelled themselves.There's a whole bunch of fantastic fic and art for you to enjoy over there!

Here are my two collaborations for the event, with sincere thanks to [livejournal.com profile] theymp and [livejournal.com profile] emmatheslayer

REVENGE IS SWEET

Title: Revenge is Sweet
Author: [livejournal.com profile] dizzojay
Artist: [livejournal.com profile] emmatheslayer
Genre: Humour, crack!fic
Characters: Sam and Dean Winchester, Crowley
Pairing: n/a
Rating: T for a few naughty words
Word count: 2,700
Warning/Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: I  don't own these guys

Summary: Sam thought he was being so witty when he cursed Crowley with a 'sweet revenge' for his part in the whole 'Demon Dean' debacle.  So how come it's Dean that suffers?



and ...

DAWN OF THE LEPUS

Title: Dawn of the Lepus
Author: [livejournal.com profile] theymp
Artist: [livejournal.com profile] dizzojay
Genre: Humour, crack!fic
Characters: Sam and Dean Winchester
Pairing: n/a
Rating: PG-13
Word count: ~2500
Warning/Spoilers: myxomatosis
Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural or its characters - these were created by Eric Kripke - I'm just borrowing them. I'm not making any commercial gain. No harm or infringement intended.

Summary: The Men of Letters' cookbook should be taken with a pinch of salt... and then possibly burned.



dizzojay: (Dean)
It's National Poetry day, so I'm joining in the poetry fun with one of my own creations!

In the United States and Canada, April is National Poetry Month. It was established in 1996 by the Academy of American Poets, so this is the twentieth time it"s been celebrated in the US. In Canada, it"s the eighteenth. Here"s how you can celebrate this literary holiday.:


Title: The Night Before Christmas (sorry, very unseasonal!)
Summary: Dean knew that she was special; his kickass, awesome car ...
Disclaimer: I don't own Dean, Sam, Impala or anyone else
Warniings: Christmas fluff!


The Night Before Christmas )
dizzojay: (Dean)
Genre: Humour
Rating: K+
Characters: Dean, Sam, OMC
Spoilers/warnings: None
Word Count: 250
[livejournal.com profile] spn_bigpretzel Challenge: Put a Supernatural character or characters of your choice in a reality TV show, either an existing one, or one of your own invention.
Disclaimer: Sadly, I don’t own Dean or Sam – I do, however, own Rocky Hotrod.  Lucky me!




The Car's the Star )
dizzojay: (Dean)

A little drabble written for the weekly challenge over on Fanfiction.net.  The drabble word was 'lock'.

A WOMAN SCORNED

Rating: K+
Genre: Humour
Characters: Sam, Dean, Impala
Spoilers/Warnings: None
Word Count: 100
Disclaimer: I don't own them …

Everyone knows that Dean loves musclecars, but not everyone appreciates the fact. )

dizzojay: (Dean)
I only just snuck this in today, but I couldn't let this auspicious day pass without marking the birthday of our marvellous lady Metallicar.
Happy Birthday baby! )
dizzojay: (Dean)
Here's a little trio of drabbles written for this week's drabble challenge over on Fanfiction.net.
The challenge word was 'toy', and after a slow start, this word REALLY inspired me!

All rated K+, no spoilers
Disclaimer: I don't own these wonderful people (and cars)


A Second Chance )


Just Like Riding a Bike )


Sucks to be You )
dizzojay: (Dean)
You may be aware that we've been running a Holiday Drabble Challenge over on [livejournal.com profile] spn_bigpretzel which ended yesterday.  There are dozens of awesome Christmas-themed drabbles by lots of wonderful writers to enjoy, so hop on over and check them out!




Final scores for the challenge will be released shortly, but in the meantime, here is my little contribution. I submitted ten drabbles and one piece of artwork:

All drabbles rating T max (for the odd naughty word only)

Pudding
Pudding Reloaded
Hark the Hammered Angel Sings
Sprouts Out ...
Tell It Like It Is
Almost Perfect
A Winchester Christmas
The Dean Winchester Guide to a Perfect Christmas Meal
The Cake of Champions
Three's Company

and artwork ... (safe for work)

Castiel's Christmas
dizzojay: (Dean)
IMPALA DREAMS


Genre: Humour
Rating: T
Characters: Dean and Impala; Impala's POV
Warnings/Spoilers: Suggestive imagery and more double entendres than you can shake a stick at!
Word Count: 300
Disclaimer: I don't own them.

xxxxx

He’s wearing those jeans I like; the really old faded ones with the frayed hole across the left knee.  You know, the ones that are a little saggy round the rear, and ride down when he bends over to reach into my engine compartment.

In fact, they’re working their way down right now as he’s leaning over to check my solenoids.

Not that I’m looking or anything, but there’s a little black smear of oil across the middle of his back from the last time he tried to pull them up.

Don’t worry honey; trust me, they’re fine where they are.

You know, having Dean getting down and dirty, handling all my moving parts is just … well …

It’s a very intense and personal moment for both of us.

He’s standing there in front of my open hood, all sweaty and grimy; covered in oil and road dust, wiping  his hands on his T-shirt.

I’m mesmerised by the way his biceps flex when he’s tightening up my nuts and bolts; and the way his tongue peeks out between those plush pink lips when he’s topping up my fluids.

Oh dear, please excuse me … but I think they may need topping up some more!

His hands are so strong, so deft.  He handles my components as if they’re something precious, and he talks to me all the while; telling me how beautiful I am, murmuring in that voice … oh my, it’s like drowning in melted chocolate.

He’s measuring my oil levels - he’s so masterful with that dipstick - and I study the strong line of his jaw down the long, sweeping curve of his throat, down the centre of that broad, firm chest, down … down …

*Sigh*

A lady’s gotta have her secrets, okay?  And, surely you can’t blame me for breaking down on purpose occasionally, can you?

xxxxx

end
dizzojay: (Dean)
A little drabble from years back extolling our love of a certain classy lady ...
No warnings, no spoilers!

dizzojay: (Dean)
Celebration for 11.04, but not really spoilery


Our beautiful screen goddess )
dizzojay: (Dean)
dizzojay: (Dean)
A little drabble that I scribbled on the back of a convention schedule over a Costa coffee in a spare two minutes yesterday!  This was for the weekly drabble challenge over on Fanfic.net and the drabble word was 'Musk'.

Typed up and polished off this morning at 6.15 am after post-con insomnia had set in!!!

SCENT PACKING

Genre: Humour
Rating: K+
Characters: Sam and Dean Winchester
Spoilers/Warnings: None
Word Count: 100
Disclaimer: Guess what - don't own them!



Dean knows exactly how to attract the ladies ... or so he thinks. )

dizzojay: (Dean)

Our show, our little show that could, is celebrating it's tenth anniversary today, and it would be most remiss of me not to mark that auspicious occasion!

So herewith, a little something I threw together to celebrate this day of days ...



Sorry if I've missed off anyone's faourite characters, but when we get to 100 years, I'll have lots more room to fit them all in :)

dizzojay: (Dean)
Here's a little drabble written for this week's DEW challenge!
Our favourite lady is feeling the heat ...



HOT STUFF

Genre: Humour
Rating: T
Characters: Impala POV.  Mentions of Sam and Dean
Warnings/Spoilers: Warning for non-graphic nudity (of course, it's me - what did you expect?)
Word Count: 100
Disclaimer: I don't own them


Hot Stuff )
dizzojay: (Dean)
Written for the [livejournal.com profile] spn_bigpretzel Fun in the Sun Comment Fic and Art Challenge

Rating; K+
Genre: Humour, Romance
Characters: Baby, Fantasticar, Dean, Sam
Spoilers/Warnings: None
Word Count: 800
Disclaimer: Don’t own them

Baby has a Summer romance.  Baby's POV



Summer Lovin' )
 
dizzojay: (Dean)
Recipient:spn_bigpretzel
Author:
Artist: denaworkshop


Big thanks to denaworkshop for this fic's amazing artwork.  She really has gone above and beyond, so be sure to go and give her lots of love, and don't miss the bonus art at the end of the story!

Original Prompt: Dean gets worked over pretty badly by a demon/windigo/etc. and has to let Cas drive the car. Cas wrecks Baby.
Warnings/Spoilers (if applicable):
possible vague spoilers for season 9 because of Cas' condition.  Otherwise, no partiular resemblance to canon
Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Castiel
Rating: T

Wordcount: 2,500

Summary: The day started badly and went downhill from there ...



More fabulous art under the cut:




FROM BAD TO WORSE )
dizzojay: (Dean)
Seeing this beautiful but desperately heartbreaking artwork that has been posted by wings128 and milly_gal today, it made me think of a certain fic.

A few years ago, I challenged Mr Dizzo to write a fanfic, and at first he said 'no way', but in the end, he did write his one and only Supernatural fanfic, (under the pseudonym of Destroyer of Wor1ds - so that should have warned me of what was to come), but he couldn't write something nice and lfuffy or exciting and action-packed ... oh no ...

Not only did he write one of the most heartbreaking things I have ever read, he showed it to me while we were out for a meal so there I was, sitting in the middle of a pub, sobbing into my risotto!

Here it is ... it's only 400 words and you've probably sussed by now it's a deathfic.  You have been warned!!!!!

The Final Drive

It's on fanfic.net, so feel free to leave Mr Dizzo some love - if you want to :)

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